Mastering Self-Regulation: How to Respond Instead of React

Do you know what triggers you and how your body responds when dysregulated? How do you master the self-regulation skill? While you can’t control everything that happens to you, you can control how you respond—and that’s where growth and freedom lie.

In this solo episode of the Inspirational Leadership podcast, Kristen discusses the power of self-regulation and how taking responsibility for how you show up can change your life and relationships. She shares practical tools like deep breathing, self-compassion, and self-soothing techniques to help regain control when triggered.

Listen in to learn how to create new neural pathways by intentionally choosing new responses, even if old patterns feel deeply ingrained.  You will also learn the importance of modeling vulnerability and repairing relationships when you don’t show up as your best self.

Key Takeaways:

• The importance of self-regulation, especially in high-stress situations where triggers can lead to dysregulation.
• Understanding fight, flight, freeze, and fawn responses in high-stress situations.
• How self-regulation can help you choose a more compassionate and intentional approach to responding.
• How apologizing and taking responsibility can repair and strengthen relationships.
• Understanding that emotions only last 90 seconds in the body, and how to break free from emotional spirals.

Standout Quotes:

• “Life is 10% what happens to you and 90% how you react to it." – Charles R. Swindoll
• “What triggers you is a mirror to show you where you're not free." – Peter Crone
• “Emotions are moved through very quickly—within 90 seconds. After that, any remaining emotional response is a choice to stay in that emotional cycle." – Dr. Jill Bolte Taylor
• “The most difficult people in your life are your biggest teachers." – Kristen Harcourt

𝗪𝗶𝘁𝗵 𝗼𝘃𝗲𝗿 𝟭𝟱-𝘆𝗲𝗮𝗿𝘀 𝗮𝘀 𝗮 𝗣𝗲𝗼𝗽𝗹𝗲 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗖𝘂𝗹𝘁𝘂𝗿𝗲 𝗟𝗲𝗮𝗱𝗲𝗿 𝗽𝗮𝗿𝘁𝗻𝗲𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘄𝗶𝘁𝗵 𝗵𝘂𝗻𝗱𝗿𝗲𝗱𝘀 𝗼𝗳 𝗰𝗼𝗺𝗽𝗮𝗻𝗶𝗲𝘀 𝘄𝗼𝗿𝗹𝗱𝘄𝗶𝗱𝗲, 𝗞𝗿𝗶𝘀𝘁𝗲𝗻 𝗲𝗺𝗽𝗼𝘄𝗲𝗿𝘀 𝗲𝘅𝗲𝗰𝘂𝘁𝗶𝘃𝗲𝘀 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗹𝗲𝗮𝗱𝗲𝗿𝘀 𝗮𝘁 𝗮𝗹𝗹 𝗹𝗲𝘃𝗲𝗹𝘀 𝘁𝗼 𝗯𝘂𝗶𝗹𝗱 𝗹𝗶𝘃𝗲𝘀 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗼𝗿𝗴𝗮𝗻𝗶𝘇𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻𝘀 𝗼𝗳 𝘀𝘂𝗰𝗰𝗲𝘀𝘀, 𝗵𝗲𝗮𝗹𝘁𝗵 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝘀𝘂𝘀𝘁𝗮𝗶𝗻𝗮𝗯𝗶𝗹𝗶𝘁𝘆. 𝗧𝗼 𝗹𝗲𝗮𝗿𝗻 𝗺𝗼𝗿𝗲 𝗮𝗯𝗼𝘂𝘁 𝗺𝘆 𝗼𝗻𝗲-𝗼𝗻-𝗼𝗻𝗲 𝗰𝗼𝗮𝗰𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗴, 𝘁𝗿𝗮𝗻𝘀𝗳𝗼𝗿𝗺𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻𝗮𝗹 𝗸𝗲𝘆𝗻𝗼𝘁𝗲𝘀, 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗼𝗻𝗴𝗼𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗹𝗲𝗮𝗱𝗲𝗿𝘀𝗵𝗶𝗽 𝘁𝗿𝗮𝗶𝗻𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘃𝗶𝘀𝗶𝘁: www.kristenharcourt.com